Welcome back to Vogue and a Latte! I am not sure how you found me, but I am glad you are here. We’re about to get deep here! If you are new, check out my About Me page or head on over to my Instagram to get a feel for who I am. Or just keep on reading and we will become fast friends!
This post concept/idea is going to be in two parts, so buckle up. I wrote the first part of this post when I felt lost, angry, and out of control of my life. First, I want you to feel freedom to admit that you are lost, angry, or feel out of control. Those emotions are real and hiding them doesn’t do any good. This is vulnerable and a part of me I didn’t know I would even share. But I want someone out there to not feel alone in the silence of life. Here goes.
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I have had no control over my life over these past few months. Like huge, monumental things that have happened, all at once, that I literally cannot control. It’s uncomfortable. It’s sad. It’s not fun. I am mad. I am crying a lot. I don’t understand why it seems as though I had everything that I ever wanted and it was all taken away from me. I feel disconnected. I don’t feel at home. The idea of comfort is so foreign as of late. Everywhere I go I feel like I have to introduce myself, to tell my story, and explain why my life is now where it is, when it isn’t what I want.
I had a life trajectory, as I am sure that most of you have. An idea of when I would be married, when I would have kids, where I would live, how happy I would be at age 25 with my little family and life all set up. It’s comforting and also frightening how little control we have over our lives. Over other peoples emotions. Over other people’s ideas of their own personal life trajectory.